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He Shot Blue Ecstasy, Boofed It & Went to Work: Jed Payne on Relapse, Lies, Shame & One Year Back

· 1 hr 22 min

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Show notes

Dave opens the Wednesday Dose of Dopey by responding to a listener who noticed he seemed a little off. He talks honestly about the pressure of producing five shows a week, his obsessive pursuit of Jason Mewes, the strange sadness that follows surrender, and what’s coming together for DopeyCon.

Then JD shares a terrifying story from his twenties: three sleepless days inside a Mississippi trailer with an ounce of cocaine, crack, beer, no food and almost no water. After a massive shot leaves him conscious but completely unable to move, his friend helps bring him back—only for JD to immediately smoke the biggest crack hit of his life.

Dave remembers Annie Ellie and Brian “Hot Wheels” Connolly through comments from the Dopey Nation before welcoming back Jed Payne of Church & Other Drugs and Rehab Bromance.

Approaching one year sober after years of concealed relapse, Jed talks about going from addiction counselor to treatment patient, sharing a room with former clients, working at a coffee shop with teenagers, and accepting the humiliation required to rebuild his life. He explains how CBD and “microdosing” became the beginning of his return to getting high, why clinicians in recovery need somewhere safe to struggle, and how easily helping addicts can replace doing your own recovery work.

Then things get properly Dopey: Jed recalls shooting cocaine while a police officer stood beside the car, injecting a bright-blue ecstasy pill in a gas-station bathroom, boofing two more pills before work, rolling with his hands submerged in marinara sauce, and eventually passing out on the prep table.

Jed and Dave also discuss 7-OH, smoke-shop opioids, Sublocade, coming off Suboxone, emotional recovery after relapse, staying present, and the small daily actions he is using to become a man of his word again.

All that and STILL MORE on the newest Wednesday Dose of Dopey!

Real talk

Need help right now?

Jokes aside. If you or someone you love is in trouble, these people pick up the phone.

  • 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline

    988

    Call or text 988, any time, for free and confidential support in a crisis.

  • SAMHSA National Helpline

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  • Safe Spot Hotline

    1-800-972-0590

    Using alone and afraid of overdosing? Call them. Staffed by people with lived and living experience with overdose and drug use.